Monday, January 31, 2011

oh mondays

sidenote: this is my last monday as a kiddo. I grow up next week, and will be working every monday, probably for the rest of my life. 7 more days.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

iNeed this

I don't have a really good track record with phones, but I'm not ready to take full responsibility. maybe when I'm 25.

my phones have had a history of dying some pretty tragic deaths, may they rest in peace. more recently, I have gone through two blackberries in the past four months, and to the same thing: it just decides to stop working.

yesterday, I picked up the phone to text an ex, and the phone broke in my hands. I'm going to go ahead and take that as a sign.

the screen is frozen, I'm due for an upgrade, and Verizon isn't letting me have the iPhone until February 10. that is 4 days, 12 hours, and 45 minutes from now.

that's a long time to go without a phone.

Friday, January 28, 2011

salt lake city slickers

so with a new job starting in salt lake, I have been looking non-stop for housing up in that area. I just had no idea what an event that would become. first I realized this, I wasn't in provo anymore.

thursday morning I drove up to meet Sandra, owner of a home off of 800 east near the U.

Sandra had to have been in her mid 40's. at least. a part-time snowboard instructor and full-time interior designer, Sandra was nice enough. but so old. and so wrinkly. and even had to get a new kidney last week, bless her heart. she was falling apart, as was the house. charming enough on the outside, but the house was built in 1908. you can put cute, eclectic pieces all you want but it does not a new house make. I didn't really feel like it would be a good fit. thanks anyways. and come to think of it, she kind of reminded me of Yzma.

next, I went to go see a cute and quaint one bedroom, one bathroom near s. temple. I'm not going all emo and I'm not about to get a cat, I just like to have my space. and it looks cute, right? definitely thought it had potential.

I met Andy at these cute remodeled apartments downtown, and was immediately afraid for my life. nestled right in between an organic cafe and a very large construction site with very large machines, was my potential new home. as we were walking into the building the very large crane started working and the whole building began to vibrate. p.s. I have edited the following for our younger readers.

Andy: what the f is that? are you f'ing kidding me? the whole f'ing building is shaking! this is tripping me out, for sure.
Rox: ......
Andy: are you sure you wanna live here?! I'm not even sure I would move in. is this an f'ing joke? but this place is wicked awesome, like the tenants are so cool. you know the head chef of this restaurant lives here...I even have people say that they come home like at 3am and there's a guy drinking a beer in his underwear. but they weren't complaining, they were just like, this is awesome.
Rox: ......

at this point I was really less than thrilled, not to mention the apartment smelled like a smoked out port a potty.

last hope: a townhome in daybreak with a 34 year old girl named shiloh. and her diaper-weraing lhasa apso named jake. I don't really have anything else to say.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

brain dump

I'm almost back to normal. 103 degree temperatures, pneumonia, kidney stones.
it was a roller-coaster of a week, touch and go there for awhile, but the doctor says he thinks I'm gonna make it.

I've never watched so much TV in my life, Netflix was the best thing that ever happened to me. Not to brag, but I watched four seasons of Keeping up with the Kardashians, one season of Kourtney and Khloe take Miami, one season of Heroes (turns out I'm not that into sci-fi), two seasons of Hoarders, two seasons of Pawn Stars and one season of Cake Boss. I wasn't sleeping much, turns out I was too sick to sleep. I had my kidney stone on Tuesday and it was the worst.

I really can't stand the "?" at the top of the screen, but can't make it go away. help me.

turning 24 tomorrow. not excited. good news, the guy at the grocery store thought I was 12.

grocery store guy: so when are you graduating from school?
me: in the spring
grocery store guy: oh that's awesome, do you think you're gonna go to BYU
me: ummm. no, noooo...I'm graduating from college
grocery store guy: REALLY?

I'm 12. I look like I'm 12. class of 2011, hollerrrrrrr.

I'm hired. after being full time unemployed for over two years, I am a workin' woman. starting February 1 in Salt Lake City, I will be working as a marketing coordinator over the visual arts of the at home learning division at the waterford research institute. what up grown up life.

sidenote: that means I'm moving to Salt Lake. if you know of any normal girls looking for a normal roommate in SLC, let me know. I'm tired of people requiring me to be gay friendly.

so glad the Bachelor is back, what a blessing.

black eye Michelle is straight crazy, and it turns out she cheated on her husband with Carlos Boozer. gross. I don't normally condone violence, but if one of those girls did punch her, I'm totally on board. She is a psychopath.

Chantal O. is sometimes pretty, but wears way too much makeup. And Brad, "I've been waiting soooo long to take Chantal on a one on one?" In Bachelor TV time it's been a total of like eight days. Maybe its like EFY and it feels like so much longer than the week you're there. Chantal wins though when she points out that Michelle's date card doesn't say "love" in it. hilarious.

Emily is a true gem, I'm not even sure that Brad deserves her, and I'm so sad for next week's episode. So traumatic. I'm just glad the vampire is gone. and Jake is slower and dumber than I remembered.

following the kidney stones, I was diet coke free for over one week. not only was it not an option, it didn't even sound good. now, I can't stop thinking about them. good idea or bad idea?

Monday, January 24, 2011

I want this...

I'm obsessed with teensy little jewelry, and this necklace is no different. my friend Shauna is giving away a gold state necklace on her blog, and if you don't win one, you should buy one at the Saylor Rose etsy shop, because I have seen them and they are darling.

the question is...home means nevada? or texas on my mind?

Sunday, January 23, 2011

puppy police

so while out on a sunday night drive, richelle and I were driving on 800 S in orem, sipping diet cokes, minding our own business and having a sunday night chat about all the normal things,

richelle: I feel like we're really fun, smart, outgoing girls, why can't we just hang out with ourselves?
roxanne: we're gonna make awesome wives.
richelle: I know, I just can't seem to convince anyone else how awesome we are.
roxanne: I'm gonna find myself.

next thing we know, we almost hit a golden retriever. richelle flipped a u-turn, put the hazards on and pulled the car over. I hopped out of the car and chased the dog down the street. before you know it, we had a 100 pound dog in the backseat of the subaru.

we fed him canned chicken, gave him water, named him comet and tucked him in the for the night. turns out it was the first taste of motherhood for richelle, who woke up hourly because of the pup's whining.

we woke up and took him to the animal shelter: saddest thing you've ever seen.

if you're wondering, he's wearing a scarf. we didn't have any other way to walk him.

we cried after dropping him off at the puppy prison.
most. traumatic. experience. ever.

for all of us.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

my body hates me

I'm not really sure how else to tell you this, so I'll give it to you in chronological order.
P.S. TMI? I don't care.

Saturday night: nausea, vomiting, sharp stomach pains.

Sunday: more nausea, and sharp stomach pains result in a trip to urgent care and the ER.
after being accompanied by megan, benita, richelle, andre', chelsea, lola,
ryan rodriguez and ryan spencer (I really just think they wanted out of church), and
five rounds of fanta tasting barium, an IV and an MRI
we ruled out appendicitis, but sent home and on painkillers. lovely.

Monday: nausea, no more stomach pains, and a temperature of 103.

Tuesday: diagnosis, kidney stones. that was the good news. bad news was a lovely chest
cough that I have developed on the side.

Seriously? WTF.

I'm not a sickly person, so the only logical explanation is that
my body refuses to turn 24 next week. it just won't have it.

also, WebMD is really not giving me anything here, so if you have
any ideas, feel free to leave me some love. you could save my life.

but if you plan on attending my funeral instead, I prefer calla lilies.

Monday, January 10, 2011

coconut kills...

it's a new year, one of goals, resolutions, and before I can do that-
I need to get something
off of my chest.
someone almost died my last day of finals in class,
and I'm pretty sure I was responsible.

I walked into my last final with a friend, and as we passed this girl
on the front row, she immediately got up and ran out of the room.
chaos ensued after that.

people started filing into class, asking frantically:
who is wearing coconut?! she is allergic, and having an attack.

what was I supposed to say?! it was me? how was I supposed to know?
it wasn't me, it was THIS.
and then, it got worse. people started sniffing other people out,
and they narrowed it down to our corner. "I think it's coming from over here."

all I could do was sink lower in my chair, and use pink grapefruit antibacterial to rid myself of the smell.

the girl never came back to class. and it was all my fault. so miss coconut allergy, it was me. and I sure am sorry you missed that final. but kind of not sorry, because coconut smells delicious, and you weren't exactly wearing a sign.

alabama, arkansas...

home is wherever I'm with you...