Tuesday, February 1, 2011

the brad bachelor. week 5.

- Brad, you're wearing a vest.

- glad Shawntel is still holding onto that running/jumping into his arms thing. don't hurt him.

-all of a sudden I want to go shopping in Vegas.

-I can't stop thinking about how she sees dead people.

-how is she all of a sudden someone he can see himself spending the rest of his life with? isn't this their first one on one date? where did she even come from?

-I hate that purse. but I wish I had it anyway.

-brit- what are you wearing? the cap? a white fuzzy robe?

-was it necessary for shawntel to have to get ready in the hotel with everyone else looking on and hating her even more?

-"I really want to take this time to tell him that I stuff dead people."

-I would probably recommend never using the words "orifices" or "vein drain" on a first date. or any date. or at dinner.

-brad: way too many hand gestures. say what you mean. use your words.

-flip-flops and a fendi dress. that's cool I guess.

-what is Brit doing here? how does she keep getting invited to these dates?

-the Ashleys are friends?

-Las Vegas is NOT looking good on Michelle. zits...fuzzy hair.

-Ashley H., please let me fix your eyebrows. I have a license.

-Brit, loving the neon outfits and white KEDS.

-Michelle is crazy.

-not sure if I could love Emily any more at this point.

-"I swear, I'm usually fun!" emily you are darling. I pick you.

-can she even see over the steering wheel? is this safe?

-Alli has the worst attitude. gross.

-"we all have problems, we all have issues" oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize you lost a spouse.

-bad body language Brad. so glad Emily put him in his place. you are old.
Emily manned up, you need to.

-lots of drinking...a lot of emotional highs...and lows...

-whoa. the L-bomb. gross.

-too bad Brad and Michelle can't have a normal conversation...oh, good makeout instead.

-Ashley H. big forehead. bad hair. bad eyebrows.

-Ashley S. baby voice. really annoying baby voice.

-"I'm always trying to convince someone to be with me." I get that. I do. hits home a little bit.

-the extraordinary wife comment for somebody else hurts a little bit. be sensitive brad.

-Ashley H. did not seem half as sad as Ashley S. said she would..wait. punched. in the face. and in the heart.

-Brit only wears neon. never not wearing neon.

-what intense connection? I don't see it.

-the Elvis "Lonely Tonight" montage is almost as painful as Taylor Swift Pandora radio after a breakup. almost.

-your first instinct may be to close yourself off Brad, but straight to the therapist isn't much better. enough with the life coach.

-I feel bad for giving her this much attention, but Michelle is straight crazy. the lap dance was cool though, and not even trashy.

-dang. cute notes don't work, and get you sent home. note to self.

-team Emily.


  1. haha LOVE! I felt the exact same way about each bullet point.

  2. Team Emily! I think the finale is going to be a murder attempt by Michelle. Just sayin.

  3. Oh my…I pretty much agreed with everything you said! Not liking Chantelle O., she giggles too much, or Michelle, she is crazzy, or Alli for that matter because she isn't special. Don't know if I really like Brad…just saying.

  4. ha! I couldn't agree more with everything you just said.